Memoir Excerpt [by Alieu Khan]

Memoir Excerpt [by Alieu Khan]

It was quite hard for me to adapt to Swedish-Finnish culture and traditions. The gap was so huge that bridging it was definitely going to take some time. Tessy had got angry with me, several times for leaving the dining table immediately after I finished eating. In the Gambia, once you finished eating your meal you are supposed to go away and not to stay for a chat. It is seen as very impolite to look at people while they are eating. In Finland it is a different thing. Eating together is seen more as an opportunity for family interaction.

Coming from a country where Islam is the dominant religion, it was also difficult for me to accept the fact that it’s normal to show affection in the open. Although the majority of us in The Gambia are moderate Muslims, we still have high regard for some Islamic values.

Lifted from chapter 1

Already I had been to the hospital with Tessy for an ultrasound test. I was so anxious to know the sex of the baby. After being in that room for over an hour, I felt very disappointed when the doctor told us that he couldn’t find out the sex. It was my first time in an ultra sound room, so I had no idea of how it works. I can remember seeing the baby moving around like crazy in there and the doctor jokingly saying it will be a stubborn child.

At the beginning of the pregnancy, I told Tessy that I wanted a boy. I don’t think I was even sure of what exactly I wanted. I just felt it might be difficult for me to come to terms with my daughter having a boyfriend as young as 12 and sleeping over with him.

What I would like is a daughter who loves herself and cares very much about her future safety and happiness. Many young girls fall prey to teenage pregnancy, abortion and dropping out of school, because they never made an attempt to figure out what they want to do with their life during their tender years.

Lifted from chapter 3

I resumed my job search, sending applications to a few offices. I was quite prepared to take anything that was offered to me. The supervisor of the Viking Line Mariehamn office, Tomas Lyyski replied to my application. Although he had no job for me, his letter was the most pleasing and encouraging one I had ever received on the island since my arrival.

“Welcome to our island - It’s great to have people from the smiling coast of Gambia here on Åland,” he wrote.

That sounded like he had visited my country. Not many people abroad know that The Gambia is sometimes referred to as the Smiling Coast of Africa. My country got that name because of its natural sun, sea and sand endowments and also its friendly people and fascinating lifestyles.

Tomas commended me for my articles in the Ålandstidningen and encouraged me to keep up the good work.

He ended his letter by explaining to me that he cannot offer me any job in his office because of my inability to speak fluent Swedish and Finnish.

“I’m sure you’ll be fluent in Swedish very soon but fluency in Finnish is also important as we give service to a lot of Finnish Viking Line Club members here in Mariehamn,” he added.

Lifted from chapter 6

We would need great co-operation in protecting our son and offering him self-confidence about his racial identity. Because someone doesn’t look particularly black or white is no excuse to be curious about his or her racial makeup. Never will I allow anyone crush his self esteem and pride with derogatory questions and comments. It’s one thing to talk about racial equality, but it’s quite another thing to live it. Prejudice is most of the time part of the life for bi-racial children in predominantly white communities.

During his campaign for the US presidency Barack Obama disclosed that his grandmother who had helped raised him and who had sacrificed a lot for him, once confessed her fear of black men.

“I chose to run for the presidency at this moment in history because I believe deeply that we cannot solve the challenges of our time unless we solve them together - unless we perfect our union by understanding that we may have different stories, but we hold common hopes; that we may not look the same and we may not have come from the same place, but we all want to move in the same direction - towards a better future for our children and our grandchildren,” from his speech – A More Perfect Union.